A good friend of mine shared a link with me on facebook that I will now share with you. Hip Mountain Mama has challenged us to make one small change each month leading up to Earth Day (April 22) and blog about it. On Earth Day, several winners will be chosen to receive a variety of green products. Super cool!
You can get all the details over at her blog.
Great green groovyness Batman!
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Fidget's Birth
As Fidget approaches her 5th birthday, I am finding it necessary to revisit her birth. She is a very needy person, wanting constant interaction, constant touching. If she's not engaged in some way, she paces back and forth through the house, randomly pausing to fidget with something. She has issues with anxiety and depression. I wonder how much of this relates to her birth.
I became pregnant with Fidget when Bookie was about a year and a half old. She was still nursing, and after consulting with the local LLLI group I found that it was safe for me to continue nursing her during my pregnancy. I committed myself to nourish both of my children, born and unborn.
It was hard though. As my milk dried up, nursing Bookie made my skin crawl. And the headaches. Oh the headaches. At least one, sometimes two or three migraines a week. I would drink cup after cup of water, thinking it was dehydration that was causing them, but it never helped. Nothing did. Dan would take Bookie outside to play, or watch videos with her while I would lay in bed with a heating pad over my eyes, trying to get some relief.
Other than the headaches and the normal nausea, there were no problems. We were eagerly anticipating the arrival of our Valentine's day baby. Then, on Thanksgiving day, my water broke. I was standing at the sink washing dishes and all of a sudden I felt a trickle. I thought I had wet my pants, but I hadn't. We called friends and asked them to take care of Bookie while I went to the hospital to get checked out. I called my midwife, who practiced at a hospital out of town and she directed me to the local hospital, saying that if the baby (we still didn't know her gender at this point) came early, we would want to be at the hospital with the best NICU.
So I went in. I can't even remember what all the tests were that they ran. I know they checked for "ferning". Ferning was key. If ferning showed up on the test strips that meant that there was amniotic fluid present, and my water had indeed broken. I asked if this meant that I would have to wean Bookie and they said yes. They also told me that I would have to stay in the hospital until the baby was born or six weeks, which ever came first.
Six weeks meant Christmas in the hospital, and New Years. I had a 2 year old I needed to take care of, but couldn't. My mom moved down to N.C. for those weeks to take care of Bookie. She could come visit me in the hospital, and could stay overnight if there was someone to stay with her. It was the worst holiday season ever.
They decided to induce me on January 2. The doctors had worked together and arranged their schedules so that I would be assured of an all female staff. The night before the induction I asked for two Ambien, because I knew I needed to rest, but I still couldn't sleep. They came and got us at 6am and took us to the L&D room. First they tried cytotec, to help ripen my cervix, but that didn't work, so they hooked me up and started giving me pitocin. The contractions came, but were bearable. Nothing really seemed to be happening. I think I managed to get to four cm. So the upped the pit. After about seven hours on pitocin and still no real advances, they checked me again. Then they told me they would have to break my water.
You're reading that right. During that period of bed rest, my bag of waters had sealed itself. So all of it was unnecessary. But there was no turning back. They broke my water. It was the most horrible experience of my life. I remember trying to crawl backwards up the bed, wanting to get away from that awful hook. After that, things picked up, though not as fast as I would have liked. I remember having a serious string of contractions and telling my nurse and midwife (who came to be my doula) that if I was still at 5 centimeters the next time they checked me, I was going to get an epidural. The nurse responded "well then we're not going to check you". I think it was about 15 minutes after that I was ready to start pushing.
I pushed for about 40 minutes. At one point I started to have a panic attack. I seriously considered getting up and running out of the room. I pushed, and I birthed her. The nurse delivered me because the doctor didn't know how to catch the baby when the mom delivered on her hands and knees.
They took her across the room immediately so the NICU team could take a look at her. I was flipped onto my back so that the doctors could stitch me up. The NICU nurse told me she thought she was stable enough for me to hold her, so they laid her on my chest. I was flat on my back, without my glasses on. I had trouble seeing her, trouble trying to get her into position to nurse. I struggled, and she struggled and the nurse took her back, down the hall and up two floors to the NICU. I lay there for an hour or more while the doctors still worked to repair me. Finally they were done and they took me upstairs to see my baby.
Dan was with her. She was on the last corridor, the one reserved for babies that require the most supervision. She was on a respirator. She was in a little plastic box and I could do nothing to help her. Nearly five years later it still upsets me and I still cry. I sat there with her for a few moments, then they took me downstairs so I could get washed. I stayed in the hospital for the maximum of three days allowed. I loved being able to walk up and see her whenever I wanted. I would page my way inside, scrub my hands and make my way back to her bed. And I would look at her, and if the nurse would let me I'd hold her.
Fidget was in the hospital for 12 days. Born at 34 weeks, weighing 4lbs, 13oz.
To be continued...
I became pregnant with Fidget when Bookie was about a year and a half old. She was still nursing, and after consulting with the local LLLI group I found that it was safe for me to continue nursing her during my pregnancy. I committed myself to nourish both of my children, born and unborn.
It was hard though. As my milk dried up, nursing Bookie made my skin crawl. And the headaches. Oh the headaches. At least one, sometimes two or three migraines a week. I would drink cup after cup of water, thinking it was dehydration that was causing them, but it never helped. Nothing did. Dan would take Bookie outside to play, or watch videos with her while I would lay in bed with a heating pad over my eyes, trying to get some relief.
Other than the headaches and the normal nausea, there were no problems. We were eagerly anticipating the arrival of our Valentine's day baby. Then, on Thanksgiving day, my water broke. I was standing at the sink washing dishes and all of a sudden I felt a trickle. I thought I had wet my pants, but I hadn't. We called friends and asked them to take care of Bookie while I went to the hospital to get checked out. I called my midwife, who practiced at a hospital out of town and she directed me to the local hospital, saying that if the baby (we still didn't know her gender at this point) came early, we would want to be at the hospital with the best NICU.
So I went in. I can't even remember what all the tests were that they ran. I know they checked for "ferning". Ferning was key. If ferning showed up on the test strips that meant that there was amniotic fluid present, and my water had indeed broken. I asked if this meant that I would have to wean Bookie and they said yes. They also told me that I would have to stay in the hospital until the baby was born or six weeks, which ever came first.
Six weeks meant Christmas in the hospital, and New Years. I had a 2 year old I needed to take care of, but couldn't. My mom moved down to N.C. for those weeks to take care of Bookie. She could come visit me in the hospital, and could stay overnight if there was someone to stay with her. It was the worst holiday season ever.
They decided to induce me on January 2. The doctors had worked together and arranged their schedules so that I would be assured of an all female staff. The night before the induction I asked for two Ambien, because I knew I needed to rest, but I still couldn't sleep. They came and got us at 6am and took us to the L&D room. First they tried cytotec, to help ripen my cervix, but that didn't work, so they hooked me up and started giving me pitocin. The contractions came, but were bearable. Nothing really seemed to be happening. I think I managed to get to four cm. So the upped the pit. After about seven hours on pitocin and still no real advances, they checked me again. Then they told me they would have to break my water.
You're reading that right. During that period of bed rest, my bag of waters had sealed itself. So all of it was unnecessary. But there was no turning back. They broke my water. It was the most horrible experience of my life. I remember trying to crawl backwards up the bed, wanting to get away from that awful hook. After that, things picked up, though not as fast as I would have liked. I remember having a serious string of contractions and telling my nurse and midwife (who came to be my doula) that if I was still at 5 centimeters the next time they checked me, I was going to get an epidural. The nurse responded "well then we're not going to check you". I think it was about 15 minutes after that I was ready to start pushing.
I pushed for about 40 minutes. At one point I started to have a panic attack. I seriously considered getting up and running out of the room. I pushed, and I birthed her. The nurse delivered me because the doctor didn't know how to catch the baby when the mom delivered on her hands and knees.
They took her across the room immediately so the NICU team could take a look at her. I was flipped onto my back so that the doctors could stitch me up. The NICU nurse told me she thought she was stable enough for me to hold her, so they laid her on my chest. I was flat on my back, without my glasses on. I had trouble seeing her, trouble trying to get her into position to nurse. I struggled, and she struggled and the nurse took her back, down the hall and up two floors to the NICU. I lay there for an hour or more while the doctors still worked to repair me. Finally they were done and they took me upstairs to see my baby.
Dan was with her. She was on the last corridor, the one reserved for babies that require the most supervision. She was on a respirator. She was in a little plastic box and I could do nothing to help her. Nearly five years later it still upsets me and I still cry. I sat there with her for a few moments, then they took me downstairs so I could get washed. I stayed in the hospital for the maximum of three days allowed. I loved being able to walk up and see her whenever I wanted. I would page my way inside, scrub my hands and make my way back to her bed. And I would look at her, and if the nurse would let me I'd hold her.
Fidget was in the hospital for 12 days. Born at 34 weeks, weighing 4lbs, 13oz.
To be continued...
Sunday, December 13, 2009
More madness
Next Sunday is our church's Christmas play. I'm the director and stage manager. I'm also a little overwhelmed. Good thing this year I picked an easy one. A Different Kind of Baby is different from other Christmas plays that I've found, in that it offers actors a chance to portray characters generally not found in the Christmas story. It's a neat play. You really ought to check it out. **nudge nudge**
So today's practice was that crazy first practice where I have to interrupt every line to explain everything to everyone: who needs to be where, what they need to be doing while they're there, what they should be listening and watching for, when to move, how to move, when to speak, how to speak, at which volume to speak...you get the idea. Multiply this by 14 kids and 4 adults. It's hard to believe that they will actually pull it off, but I know they will. I've seen it before.
So this week I have to:
--Create two lists, one for each of the entrances to the sanctuary. These lists will be for the mothers who have volunteered to man the doors, and will tell them who will be entering their door, what costumes they will be changing into, and when they will returning to stage.
--Decide on songs and prepare scripts for our pianist and possibly the choir.
--Create cards/signs on which the individual lines will be printed. I will sit of the floor during the play, with the cards in order, and will flip the cards as the lines are delivered. I might also put my stage directions on the back so I don't have to keep up with the cards AND my script.
--Create sheep costumes for Bookie and Fidget, possibly one or two other little sheep.
--Meet someone at the church so we can venture into the attic to find costumes, props, etc.
--Fret about what I might be forgetting.
I was really starting to freak out this afternoon when I thought I had to do all of this AND make Christmas presents for the kiddos. Then I remembered that we will be celebrating the 12 days of Christmas, so not everything has to be done by the 25th.
Next year, something has got to change. Maybe I can discipline myself to have Christmas presents made before Thanksgiving. Maybe next year I'll get the script out to the kids at the beginning of November and have it blocked by then too. Maybe next year we won't be renovating part of our house in the middle of the holiday season. Maybe Little Man won't be teething and waking up every hour of the night. The way things stand right now I am one very worn out, stressed out Mama. And I don't like it one bit.
So today's practice was that crazy first practice where I have to interrupt every line to explain everything to everyone: who needs to be where, what they need to be doing while they're there, what they should be listening and watching for, when to move, how to move, when to speak, how to speak, at which volume to speak...you get the idea. Multiply this by 14 kids and 4 adults. It's hard to believe that they will actually pull it off, but I know they will. I've seen it before.
So this week I have to:
--Create two lists, one for each of the entrances to the sanctuary. These lists will be for the mothers who have volunteered to man the doors, and will tell them who will be entering their door, what costumes they will be changing into, and when they will returning to stage.
--Decide on songs and prepare scripts for our pianist and possibly the choir.
--Create cards/signs on which the individual lines will be printed. I will sit of the floor during the play, with the cards in order, and will flip the cards as the lines are delivered. I might also put my stage directions on the back so I don't have to keep up with the cards AND my script.
--Create sheep costumes for Bookie and Fidget, possibly one or two other little sheep.
--Meet someone at the church so we can venture into the attic to find costumes, props, etc.
--Fret about what I might be forgetting.
I was really starting to freak out this afternoon when I thought I had to do all of this AND make Christmas presents for the kiddos. Then I remembered that we will be celebrating the 12 days of Christmas, so not everything has to be done by the 25th.
Next year, something has got to change. Maybe I can discipline myself to have Christmas presents made before Thanksgiving. Maybe next year I'll get the script out to the kids at the beginning of November and have it blocked by then too. Maybe next year we won't be renovating part of our house in the middle of the holiday season. Maybe Little Man won't be teething and waking up every hour of the night. The way things stand right now I am one very worn out, stressed out Mama. And I don't like it one bit.
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Children's Christmas Party
Our church's Christmas party was today. Only three children showed up. Yup, my three. So we had fun. We made Christingles, cards for our military members and gift baskets for our shut-ins.
Christingles
Memaw and the girls making cards
Gift baskets
It was a lot of fun and a chance for us to celebrate the birth of Christ by offering gifts of love and service.
Ha! While researching how exactly to pronounce Christingle I found out we put the foil in the wrong place. Oh well. With the foil on the bottom, it helps them stand up. :) There's got to be some symbolism in that...somewhere.
Christingles
Memaw and the girls making cards
Gift baskets
It was a lot of fun and a chance for us to celebrate the birth of Christ by offering gifts of love and service.
Ha! While researching how exactly to pronounce Christingle I found out we put the foil in the wrong place. Oh well. With the foil on the bottom, it helps them stand up. :) There's got to be some symbolism in that...somewhere.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Cute nature craft
These are so cute!!!
http://lilfishstudios.blogspot.com/2009/11/acorn-mushroom-ornament-tutorial.html
http://lilfishstudios.blogspot.com/2009/11/acorn-mushroom-ornament-tutorial.html
Monday, December 7, 2009
Preparing for the Christmas party
Well, I said I would introduce you to Fidget and Dan-o, but that will have to wait til another day. I didn't get to play much with the camera today. Today was our rush day: out of bed, breakfast, dressed, out the door to get groceries, home, groceries in, our car to the shop, Dan off to work. I hate rushing, so I'm just going to stop there. Once is enough.
I did begin getting things together for the children's Christmas party this Saturday. This year the children will be reminded that Jesus' birth is the reason we celebrate. Since it's Jesus' birthday, we will have them consider what "gifts" we could give to him. The kids will then have an opportunity to create cards, which will be mailed to our military members; gift baskets, which will be delivered to our shut-ins; and a Christingle, which will go home with them to remind them of Jesus' love for our world. Then we'll gather and sing Happy Birthday to Jesus, have cake and go home. We'll also be collecting food for the county food bank. Oh yes, and because all of our crafts are biodegradable or recycled, we're taking care of God's creation!
I hope it goes well.
I did begin getting things together for the children's Christmas party this Saturday. This year the children will be reminded that Jesus' birth is the reason we celebrate. Since it's Jesus' birthday, we will have them consider what "gifts" we could give to him. The kids will then have an opportunity to create cards, which will be mailed to our military members; gift baskets, which will be delivered to our shut-ins; and a Christingle, which will go home with them to remind them of Jesus' love for our world. Then we'll gather and sing Happy Birthday to Jesus, have cake and go home. We'll also be collecting food for the county food bank. Oh yes, and because all of our crafts are biodegradable or recycled, we're taking care of God's creation!
I hope it goes well.
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Gifted
You may have noticed that photo quality has improved on my blog. You (and I) have my wonderful friend Jenn to thank for that. This morning she presented our family with a digital camera. One that doesn't need any special software to work with our computer. YAY!
I had fun with it this afternoon. Here are few I'd like to share with you.
Bookie,
Little Man,
And Me!
Tomorrow you'll get to meet Fidget and Dan-o. Thanks again Jenn!
I had fun with it this afternoon. Here are few I'd like to share with you.
Bookie,
Little Man,
And Me!
Tomorrow you'll get to meet Fidget and Dan-o. Thanks again Jenn!
The second light of Advent...
The second light of Advent is the light of plants--
Plants that reach up to the sun, and in breezes dance.
Today we added to our Advent calendar. After church the we went out side with scissors to gather greenery for our spiral. Holly, fir, pine, and red tip leaves now adorn our spiral as well as sage, lavender, santolina and Fidget's favorite, wood sorrel.
We also continued our St. Nicholas celebration. The girls woke this morning to find the boot they had left out the night before filled with goodies. Mom printed out some coloring pages and a matching game for the girls. This evening I shared a few more stories of St. Nick's life, and we sang "Jolly Old St. Nicholas". This was the first time we celebrated St. Nicholas' day. I have enjoyed it.
Plants that reach up to the sun, and in breezes dance.
Today we added to our Advent calendar. After church the we went out side with scissors to gather greenery for our spiral. Holly, fir, pine, and red tip leaves now adorn our spiral as well as sage, lavender, santolina and Fidget's favorite, wood sorrel.
We also continued our St. Nicholas celebration. The girls woke this morning to find the boot they had left out the night before filled with goodies. Mom printed out some coloring pages and a matching game for the girls. This evening I shared a few more stories of St. Nick's life, and we sang "Jolly Old St. Nicholas". This was the first time we celebrated St. Nicholas' day. I have enjoyed it.
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Oh the craziness...
...of the season. It's beginning. I really shouldn't be taking the time to sit and blog, but I find the process to be therapeutic. I checked and Pandora has a folk Christmas music channel. Repeatedly hearing "O Come, O Come Emmanuel" is also therapeutic.
Today we began our St. Nick's celebration. My intentions were to make snow dough and have that for the girls to play with while I read them stories of the life of St. Nick. But the snow dough didn't work out. It never formed a ball, and was super sticky, no matter how much flour I added. So I chucked the snow dough and pulled out the modeling beeswax. Fidget made an angel and Bookie made a candle while I read some stories I found at this site. Both were added to our tree as decoration.
The most therapeutic moment of the evening came during the lighting of our Advent spiral. We cut the lights off, lit the candle and the Christmas tree. Bookie chose the booklet of the day from the Advent calendar my mom gave us and read to us. Fidget moved Mary and Joseph forward. On the radio played "O Come, O Come Emmanuel". And for a moment I found peace. Deep peace. Powerful peace. It washed over me, and then it passed.
I am thankful for moments like that.
Today I leave you with our Advent prayer. We sing this every day after we light our spiral, and we sing it every week with our church family.
Oh, hear us, we pray, God, for dark is the night.
And still we are waiting in hope for the light.
Oh, teach us to trust you, preparing the way,
Until with rejoicing we enter the day.
Today we began our St. Nick's celebration. My intentions were to make snow dough and have that for the girls to play with while I read them stories of the life of St. Nick. But the snow dough didn't work out. It never formed a ball, and was super sticky, no matter how much flour I added. So I chucked the snow dough and pulled out the modeling beeswax. Fidget made an angel and Bookie made a candle while I read some stories I found at this site. Both were added to our tree as decoration.
The most therapeutic moment of the evening came during the lighting of our Advent spiral. We cut the lights off, lit the candle and the Christmas tree. Bookie chose the booklet of the day from the Advent calendar my mom gave us and read to us. Fidget moved Mary and Joseph forward. On the radio played "O Come, O Come Emmanuel". And for a moment I found peace. Deep peace. Powerful peace. It washed over me, and then it passed.
I am thankful for moments like that.
Today I leave you with our Advent prayer. We sing this every day after we light our spiral, and we sing it every week with our church family.
Oh, hear us, we pray, God, for dark is the night.
And still we are waiting in hope for the light.
Oh, teach us to trust you, preparing the way,
Until with rejoicing we enter the day.
Friday, December 4, 2009
My husband generally doesn't read my blog, bless his heart. Dan, if you're reading this STOP! WALK AWAY FROM THE COMPUTER! Or at least hit the back button...
Ok. Now with that out of the way, I can share with the rest of you what we've been up to.
Tonight we made beer soap. Dan likes his beer. He also likes to take baths. Generally, he never involves his beer with his baths, but now he can.
It was the first time I made soap with the girls. I chopped the soap, Fidget greased the muffin tin, Bookie ground the oats with the mortar and pestle. Little Man watched. It was nice working with short people. They could easily see into the microwave and alert me to any boil overs. The soap turned out nice, a creamy light brown color. We've hidden them in the cabinet to set over night. Tomorrow, we'll wrap them up.
I'm toying with the idea of making batches with different kinds of beer and using mini muffin tins as molds. I could wrap them up individually and sell them at the store as stocking stuffers. I've read that citrus scents work well in beer soap. I'd like to try different combinations of beer and scents to see what works best. Should be fun...
Ok. Now with that out of the way, I can share with the rest of you what we've been up to.
Tonight we made beer soap. Dan likes his beer. He also likes to take baths. Generally, he never involves his beer with his baths, but now he can.
It was the first time I made soap with the girls. I chopped the soap, Fidget greased the muffin tin, Bookie ground the oats with the mortar and pestle. Little Man watched. It was nice working with short people. They could easily see into the microwave and alert me to any boil overs. The soap turned out nice, a creamy light brown color. We've hidden them in the cabinet to set over night. Tomorrow, we'll wrap them up.
I'm toying with the idea of making batches with different kinds of beer and using mini muffin tins as molds. I could wrap them up individually and sell them at the store as stocking stuffers. I've read that citrus scents work well in beer soap. I'd like to try different combinations of beer and scents to see what works best. Should be fun...
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